Dating a guy with no title

Anyways, we slept together…and for me it was amazing; and continues to be. He also paid me lots of little compliments. He would say he thought I was pretty, that my eyes were beautiful, etc…etc. Sometimes when we had deep conversations, we talked about past relationships and damaged goods. In November of last year, the first girl he has ever really loved broke his heart.

They had made plans to get married after he graduated, so it was really hard on him. Flash forward two months, which brings us to where we are now. I wrote him a letter telling him that I was beginning to fall in love with him two weeks ago. I addressed the fact that he is not over his ex, saying that I know what it is like to be unable to get over someone, but that I like him so much I would still be interested in him, regardless of his broken feelings from his past.

He drove out here to see me that weekend and said that he is not ready for a relationship, and that he is still messed up over his past…plus he has never much cared for relationships, dating and marriage.

Talking vs Dating; Title vs No Title | Her Campus

He said he was afraid of hurting me because he has done this to some women in the past. Started out really liking them, but then it never grew into anything more. None of his relationships have ever lasted consecutively over 6 months.


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We have been on one date since then, and we had a lot of fun. He read the 7 Harry Potter books for me in one week, so that we could talk about them and watch the movies together. We are exchanging gifts and he has invited me to stay over with his family for Christmas Eve.

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So basically, we are already in a relationship…. I am going back in forth between, hold out, be patient as he did say that it was the best way to deal with him. But I keep hearing what he said about his past relationships in my head.

What if it never changes, what if I am never special to him like his ex was? He makes time for me, he shares deep emotions with me, we see each other every weekend, even when we are exhausted from our opposite work schedules and the hour drive. He is doing everything a guy does when he cares about you and considers you a girlfriend. He is often at least somewhat affectionate with me in public, so what is the deal…why is a relationship any different from all of these things we are already doing?

Something to think about…. This is true, so how do I go about changing that? Or is the title really even important at this point? I spent Christmas with him, and in every respect he treated me like a girlfriend all weekend. He received tickets to a play in February and told his parents that he is going to bring me with him.


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Ok So ive been talking to this guy for the past two months that i have been seeing alot. We have been talking everyday since we met and we hang out about times a week. He works an overnight shift four days out the week including the weekend, on two days he has his 2yr old daughter so he really only has one day to himself which he always spends with me and we always go on a date on that day.

I come over to see him and we hang out and watch movies and his daughter is there as well. Ive also met a few of his friends already. Hes cooked dinner for me and showed that he is very interested in me and i know he cares about me. He said im a priority to him but i just feel like we arent going anywhere. He has showed that he likes me alot, and he is always reaching out to me and has also complained that i never hit him up.

I brought it up to him about where this is going and he said he wanted to take things slow and wants to see where it goes. He did say he could see me as his girlfriend but its been two months and I feel like i could be using my time on somoene who is more about making moves. At times i felt like i was just a convenience and I work out for his schedule and he uses me for his company since he pretty much has no life because of his schedule. Sometimes I go out on weekends and when i do he always wants me to stay up til he gets out so we can hang out which i have done a few times, but im starting to feel like im too good and have more to offer.

My girlfriends are all single and with good reason.. But I am not. If I never get married that is fine by me. However… I have been dating this man for something like 8 months.. What is the difference?! I am so good to him.. One of my guy friends.. I never asked for a title. I never put any pressure on him. He moved in with me on his own merit. And it slips out of my mouth one wine filled evening and I get backhanded so hard I still have whiplash.

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I just started dating a man I am good friends with. We have been friends for about two and an half years and have been dating for just two months. We initially met for dating but it never transpired and we just stayed good friends over the years, though I did think that there was a little more to it than that. Since we were friends I have never known him to have a girl. We were out for our usual drinks and banter when he initiated things with me.

However I can feel him resisting the natural flow of things- its like he wants to put a cap on how much we see each other, what type of communication we have and the pace of things in general. I did gentile bring up the subject with him and that illuminated a lot of mixed feelings from him. He went on to say that he thought I liked him more than he liked me and was worried about endangering our friendship. He asked me that I just bare with him with regards the pace of things and see where things go from there.

But since then I have been awarded new opportunities here and decided that it was not the right time to go. He was fine when I told him.


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  4. I said that I wished to see him a little more and asked if we could find a happy balance for both of us. He was upset, I was upset the whole thing was completely out of hand!

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    My situation is almost the exact same. He says he just likes to make sure he knows the girl really well first and can trust her. The title thing bugs me, sure. I know people get blinded by romance but I would like to thank you for giving advice not to let your friends influence your happiness. We are staying for that hope, that things will get better. Sometimes I think that is my problem. Ive spent so long on him already, and keep on, deep down , thinking that eventually it will all work out. Yet logically speaking why waste time on something when in the present its already proving to be much much much less than what you deserve?

    However, your story of being with your guy for three years scares me as I feel like this could easily be me. Then that would really hurt!

    "I'm Not Ready for a Relationship" (Matthew Hussey, Get The Guy)

    I must find the strength to walk away as you should too. There will be some guy out there proud to call me his girlfriend and want to shout it from the roof tops.

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    I just need to get the guts to break contact once and for all and go find that guy. Im actually studying for exams right now and reading this article just made me break down. I really hope all you girls realise that we all have a choice in what we accept from a guy. Except I know how hard it is. He still hasnt asked me to be his girlfriend even though he knows thats what I want. Weve been so close that I am sure if I left him it would be so hard for him to get over me. We bascially see each other throughout the week and doing everything physical and boyfriend and girlfriend would do for three years.

    But that fact is he refuses to call me his girlfriend. Its so obvious that all girls in this situation deserves better, but when your in the situation yourself you realise its so not black and white and its a cycle of blaming yourself for not having more respect, yet confused and unable to leave at the same time. My advice to all of you is to leave after six months. Why are all of us asking why we cant leave?? It really really sucks guys. Whats going to happen to us? If I left how much would it hurt answer.

    I never thought I could accept this, but I do. I enjoy my freedom and have other male friends, but have no desire for intimacy with them.